During the holidays, with birthdays or other special occasions, it can be daunting to find the perfect gift for a loved one. Gifts we give as tokens of celebration can have finite utility or value in the same way that movement performed infrequently doesn’t tend to add long-lasting value to our energetic currency. Just as I encourage everyone to engage in a physical practice more regularly, I would like to propose a different or additional way to give presents to others. In today’s fast-paced, hyper-connected and stimulated world, the gift of presence stands out as one of the most meaningful things you can offer. It doesn’t require extravagant gestures or material resources—just your full attention and heartfelt commitment to truly be there for someone, and the impact of this gift stretches long beyond the opening of a wrapped gift.
Being present is more than just showing up; it’s about showing care, creating space for connection, and demonstrating respect for the moment. Think of how wonderful it feels when someone you care about offers you their undivided attention, which can be challenging with the busyness in all our lives. Here are my top three practical ways to cultivate and share the gift of presence in your everyday life.
• Embrace Active Listening
Listening is truly the foundation of presence as you don’t just hear what someone is saying, you give them attention with your full self. When you are listening, maintain eye contact to convey that you’re engaged and focused on them. Let the other person fully express themselves before responding, a practice of active listening where you listen to understand rather than focusing on interjecting your opinion or response. Can you remember the last time you listened this way, not just waiting for the person to stop talking so you could share your thoughts? It can be very challenging to our chatterbox tendencies where we quickly interrupt as soon as a thought comes to the surface. When you listen to understand rather than to respond, you validate others and deepen the connection. In my kids’ elementary school, they passed around a “talking stick” which was held by an individual who had permission to talk while all others listened. This community exercise was a beautiful and helpful way to practice active listening, and we can all learn from it!
• Eliminate Distractions
In a culture that seems to reward multi-tasking, it can take practice to create a distraction-free zone to honor the people and moments in front of you. Nothing disrupts the gift of presence more than distractions, so eliminate the obvious ones first. Put away or silence your phone, create a quieter environment that supports focus, and commit to single-tasking, whether it’s in a conversation, a shared meal, or an activity. With these actions, you can naturally become more mindful and rooted in the present moment. One of my favorite ways to spend time with my family is playing a family game; no one leaves the table unless it’s for the bathroom or a drink! Those evenings warm my heart because we are all together, engaged, and having fun. My husband instilled this early by saying that he didn’t want any gifts, just a game night, knowing that this gift of presence was priceless.
• Be Present with Yourself
You can’t fully offer presence to others without practicing it for yourself. I truly believe that this practice is one of self-care and should be prioritized as a daily habit. Movement is the clearest path for me to be fully present with myself and it has become a gift that I always appreciate. If a movement practice still feels like a burden or chore to you, how can you reframe this opportunity to help, heal, and energize your whole self as a privilege that you ‘get to do’, not as a task that you ‘have to do’? Be kind to yourself by recognizing that being fully present takes effort and time, and it’s fine to have ‘off’ days, both physical and mental. Give yourself moments to recharge, reflect, and internalize the practice of presence. When you nurture your own well-being, you’re better equipped to be there for others, and the gift of presence truly benefits all!
In this chaotic era, I know that we share an appreciation for the preciousness of focused attention and presence. Let’s keep giving ourselves and each other this gift of presence and know that I am here to support you!
