Self-care often gets mislabeled as indulgent or even selfish, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. For many women especially, taking time for personal wellbeing comes with guilt or justification. Yet caring for yourself is not a luxury; it’s a necessity.
I never learned to apologize for self-care for women. Growing up with triplet brothers, an older sibling, and a very outnumbered mom, self-reliance was part of my foundation. As a result, prioritizing my physical and mental health always felt essential, not optional.
However, during my years teaching yoga, I’ve been struck by how many people—mostly women—struggle with guilt around simple self-care practices like exercise, rest, or pleasure. One teacher trainee once asked how to maintain her strengthened yoga practice.
When I suggested attending classes regularly and building a home practice, she admitted she felt guilty spending that much time on herself. She wondered if she should be volunteering more or doing more for others.
She’s not alone.
Why Self-Care Isn’t Selfish
We all understand the metaphor: put your oxygen mask on first. But how many of us live that way day to day? Self-care isn’t about escaping responsibility; it’s about sustaining ourselves so we can show up fully for others. In my house, we say, “When mama is happy, everyone is happy.” The opposite is true as well.
The real challenge isn’t knowing that self-care matters—it’s knowing how to practice it consistently. That’s where a daily self-care routine grounded in simplicity becomes powerful. The Five S’s of Self-Care, are simple, practical, and sustainable.
The Five S’s of Self-Care
1. Sweat: Move Your Body Every Day
Movement is foundational to holistic self-care. Sweating daily, through intentional exercise, not stress, wakes up your nervous system and improves your mood, energy, patience, productivity, and overall wellbeing.
Daily movement:
- Boosts mental clarity
- Improves energy and focus
- Supports healthier food choices
- Enhances emotional resilience
Even a short workout lights an internal fire that fuels your ambition, creativity, and sense of aliveness. Sweat is self-care in its most embodied form.
2. Shower: Cleanse the Body and Mind
If you sweat daily, you need to rinse it away. But showering is more than hygiene; it’s a ritual of renewal and an essential part of a daily self-care routine.
During the early days of motherhood, even when exhausted, I committed to sweating and showering every day. To this day, I don’t feel fully awake without it.
A shower:
- Signals a reset to the nervous system
- Clears mental fog
- Creates a sense of freshness and readiness
Feeling clean, physically and mentally, sets the stage for the next S.
3. Smile: Choose a Lighter Lens
Movement and cleanliness naturally lift your mood. Adding a daily commitment to smiling reinforces that shift. Research shows that even a half-smile held for two minutes can change your outlook. Smiling isn’t denial but a conscious choice to view the world through a more spacious lens.
Smiling:
- Improves mood and emotional regulation
- Reduces stress
- Creates positive energy that impacts others
These simple self-care practices don’t just benefit you—they ripple outward.
4. Sleep: Prioritize Rest and Recovery
Sleep is one of the most overlooked pillars of self-care for women, especially those balancing work, family, and emotional labor. Most people are chronically under-rested, which affects productivity, mood, organization, and overall health.
Aim for:
- 7–8 hours of sleep per night
- Consistent bedtime routines
- Reduced evening stimulation
Daily movement (see #1) makes quality sleep easier as your body naturally transitions into rest when it’s been physically engaged. Well-rested people show up more present, patient, and engaged in their lives.
5. Simplify: Create Space for What Matters Most
The first four S’s prepare us for the most transformative one: simplicity.
When we move, cleanse, smile, and rest, we gain clarity. That clarity helps us recognize what truly matters and what doesn’t—an essential principle of holistic self-care.
Simplifying your life:
- Reduces mental and emotional clutter
- Frees you from unnecessary attachments
- Creates peace and focus
While material things offer quick gratification, long-term fulfillment comes from non-material sources: relationships, nature, creativity, movement, and presence. Simplicity means clarity.
When I feel overwhelmed, I return to gratitude—three simple things:
- A cup of coffee while writing
- The sun on my face in Upward Dog
- My children’s laughter
This practice resets my nervous system and reconnects me to what truly nourishes me.
The True Meaning of Self-Care
Self-care isn’t complicated. It doesn’t require expensive products or elaborate routines. It’s about honoring your basic human needs consistently and without guilt. A sustainable daily self-care routine built on movement, rest, and simplicity creates space to live more clearly, more joyfully, and more generously. That is the fullest expression of self-care.
